Police Excuses

They won't work 100% of the time but you might as well give it a try if you are trying to get out of a sticky situation.

1. I'm sorry I ran the stop sign/red light, I didn't see it because I spilt this drink on me right before it. Now I have to go clean my self off and the car. (As you are getting pulled over for running a stop sign or a red light, grab a drink and discreetly pour it all over yourself and the floor. It might get you out of the situation or leave you all wet with a ticket. Seem upset and overwhelmed)

2. I'm sorry I was speeding, I'm rushing to the washroom, I really have to go, I have bad diareah I'm about to go in my pants. Please, if your going to give me a ticket, let me use the washroom first. Please.(Clinch your body, and act as if you are about to go in your pants, they might let you go free. If you get off free, go use the washroom for your lucky break)

3. I'm sorry about speeding, I was just informed my ________(family member) is in critical condition due to a car crash a few hours ago. I'm heading towards ________ Hospital(name of hospital in the direction you are driving). Can you tell me the fastest way to get there? I won't speed anymore I'm sorry, I'm very worried and trying to make it to the hospital asap. (They might let you go free, but if they tell you to follow them to the hospital, follow them and thank them for the directions and assitance. It might get you out of a heffty ticket and fine)

4. I'm sorry for drinking and driving officer, I was just broken up with by my wife/fionce/girlfriend and I don't know what to do. Please let me leave my car around here and take a taxi cab home. I'll pick it up tomorrow, please let me go. (It might not work in your situation, but if you start crying and sell your story, the police officer might have sympathy for you and let you go.)

5. I'm sorry officer about running the stop sign/red light, this water bottle got stuck under my brake pedal which wouldn't allow me to brake. I kicked it out from under the brake pedal right after the stop sign/red light. It wasn't intentional, the bottle was under my seat and rolled under my brake pedal.

6. I'm sorry officer for drinking and driving, my friend over their in the back seat is having a heart attack and I was the one, most sober to drive him to the hospital, can you rush him there and I'll pull over and take a taxi home ? (speak worried and rushed-tell your buddy to get better at the hospital, you'll pick him up!)

7. I'm sorry officer for coming onto this private property. There was no bad intentions, we were looking around because we heard screaming from the darkness over there.(Point to a dark or inaccecible spot where you heard "screams")

8. Officer, I'm sorry for being on the phone and driving. I just recieved a phone call from _______(person) and he warned me about an emergency that I must attend at home/hospital. (Act scared and worried)

9. I'm sorry officer for speeding/running the red light, I have bladder problems and I'm peeing myself slowly. I'm trying to find a washroom before I piss on my self completely. (While you are being pulled over, grab some water and pour it on your crotch area, it might get you off the hook! Speak rushed and clinch your body to act as if you are about to piss yourself)

10. Officer, I appologize for speeding, I'm late and I'm rushing to the hospital for my surgery, because it is today! The surgery is for my ________ (kidney, appendix, breast cancer, brain, lower back, spine, gastric bypass, vascular, etc)(act rushed and nervous).

11. I'm so sorry officer, for speeding/running the red light/careless driving, I have my period and my tampon is slipping out, I feel disguisting and I'm just trying to go change it somewhere. (Female)

12. I'm so sorry officer for speeding, I was being tailed behind my car for a few lights. I needed to keep distance between me and the car behind. I think he/she was drunk, I was scared for my life so I started to change lanes and speed up and he/she would just follow less than a meter behind. Thank you officer for getting me out of that situation.(sound very relieved)

13. I'm very sorry officer for speeding/running the red, my friend just called me and told me he seen my girlfriend/wife cheating on me. I'm rushing to see if this is true. It's horrible. (seem depressed and rushed)